Wedding...bah!

I am a royal wedding scrooge.

I did not watch William and Kate get married.

I just couldn't bear it.

I was not always this way.

My sister and I got up early for both Diana and Fergie's weddings. We watched it all, from the pre-pre-wedding show to the bitter, bitter end. We were embroiled in the dress debates and hair arguments. We were ALL about it.

Nowadays, I just can't ignore the feeling that there is something wrong with it. Not marriage! Royalty. There is something so fundamentally unfair about a family being given all that money and power in return for what currently amounts to ceremonial and social duties.

I recently read a discussion online of people debating the necessity of the Royal Family in the UK. It started out as a very interesting conversation about land ownership, taxes and entitlement. Then I read the statement, "...and William will make a really cute king. lol."

Help.

6

Tomorrow, Max will be 6 years old.

He was big (9.3 lbs). He was beautiful.

He made me a Mummy.

All my best 'firsts' are because of him.

And so tomorrow, for the first time, I will be the Mummy of a 6 year old.

I can't wait.

I have written before of the bittersweet feeling of watching children grow and change. I will miss his 5 year old self. He was a great 5 year old. He will be a super 6 year old. I will delight in watching him grow and change this year too. My little Maxi-moo.

Holiday's End

My holiday week is over. My 5 year old learned to ride a T bar without falling off and to ski down the 'big hill'. My 3 year old gave me oh so much love...just what her mama needed AND I found out that I can rejoice at 6 am! Who knew?

Holiday

So it is here. Another holiday. Another opportunity to extinguish the guilt I carry around every moment of every day for working away from my home and my children.

Challenge number one: to remain light hearted and congenial when Max wakes me at 6:00am each and every day.

Challenge number two: to cram in all the doctor/dentist/gynecologist appointments we need to catch up with.

Challenge number three: Not to waste away the days.

Challenge number four: Not to over-schedule

(Number three and Number four are hard to balance).

I think the key will be to get up every day being thankful that Max is such a bubbly morning person, that we are all healthy, that we have so much time to spend with one another and to rejoice in each and every day we are given! The interesting thing and the real challenge will be...can I remember to do this at 6am?

Can one really rejoice this early.

We shall see.

Lift

I belong to a church that is all wrong for me.

I like stone walls, stained glass, hymns and ordained ministers.

I like pews, real wine during communion and "thanks be to God" in all the right places.

Therefore, every Sunday I am quite often...uncomfortable.

The funny thing is, I know I am in the right place.

I am being challenged to think beyond tradition and symbolism.

I am learning so much,

I am growing in faith,

I feel like I am at the beginning of something when I thought I was at the end.

That is an amazing feeling.

I even caught myself humming a little praise music...uh oh;-)

New Year

Ok...so I didn't keep all of my New Year's resolutions from last year but I think I did get better at some things.

This year I am keeping numbers 1 and 2 from last year's list:

1. Try harder and be better at speaking German

2. Learn to sew

Number two is being made significantly easier by the fact that Josh bought me a sewing machine for Christmas! I have already hemmed curtains and 2 pairs of trousers. Whoopee:-) I must really try and break out of my already formed 'rut' of sewing only things that require a straight line. This is also how I knit. Potholders and scarves.

I am also introducing two new ones:

3. I shall run. (By this, I mean to run for exercise, not run away)

4. I shall write more.

Isla says goodbye to being 2!

As of tomorrow, she will have been in my life for 3 years.

I sit here tonight, watching the snow fall and I remember that I was doing the same thing the night before she was born. I was checked in to the hospital and spent the night dreaming of her. What would she be like? Anticipation kept me awake.

She was born early that morning with a furrowed brow.

She was soft and smelled just heavenly.

She liked to cuddle right from the start and still does.

I can scarcely remember my life without her.

I kissed her goodnight tonight and pressed my cheek against her soft one. I closed my eyes and willed myself to remember this cuddle. In many years when she no longer wants my cuddles, or years beyond that when she is too far away for nightly "goodnights", will I remember our moment, cheek-to-cheek, my last cuddle with her two year old self? I hope so.

Tomorrow morning a three year old will bound into our lives and I will be grateful for her. But tonight, I am missing (just a little bit) my two year old baby.